Of all the time wasting, soul-sucking Web sites, Twitter has emerged from the social networking shadows to become one of the most popular, and addictive, of them all, promising if anything to make it to a creepy episode of VH1’s “Remember the 2000s?” in the very near future.

Twitter operates with the simple premise of “what are you doing?” in which users can post micro-blogs in the form of “tweets” in 140 characters or less. And while excessively annoying, Twitter is getting increasingly celebrated by nearly everybody– CNN, my sister, even Shaq. Even I have one.

But one of the most interesting things to develop from Twitter isn’t the proliferation of information to the masses at an almost instantaneous speed.

No, the best thing about Twitter is the acceptance and large-scale usage by celebrities. If you think about it, it’s the perfect apparatus for a celebrity. In what other way can somebody egotistically post exactly what they’re doing at every waking minute of every day? It’s a megalomaniac’s wet dream. Also, you don’t even have to be a celebrity to act like you’re one on Twitter. Twitter is a medium through which anybody can think everyone else gives a crap about them. In a weird way, it’s self-affirming.

Nevertheless, after scouring the Internet for hours and hours, I have compiled a list of the 4 most entertaining people to follow on Twitter. If you need a pick-me-up, check out a few “tweets” from these egotistical narcissists whenever you get a chance.

-Tyler Branson is an English senior.

Shaq

If Shaq was motivated to prove Katt Williams wrong when he characterized Shaq as a dumb, bumbling goofball in one of his standup sets, he isn’t showing it with his Twitter.

With frequent updates and photos of himself doing mundane things – Shaq at the gym, Shaq at work (he’s a cop now?), Shaq petting a puppy – he sets himself up to be endlessly entertaining in a David Letterman’s “Stupid Human Tricks” kind of way.

Frequently in all caps, Shaq’s uplifting words of advice range from, “Just got dat underwater ipod adaption device jammy so I can hear music unda water, I b aqua jammin, Waaaa Waaa Shaq-mu The quilla,” or, my personal favorite, an early morning post, “I’M UP EARLY TO TWIT WITH OPRAH.”

Priceless.

John Mayer

I’ve heard that pop musician John Mayer was funny. And after following him for a while on Twitter, I tend to agree. He’s a pretty hilarious guy who loves to update on his Twitter in a self-deprecating, “Hey, I’m doing it ironically” kind of way.

His most recent tweet reads, “Last night we ended up in Reno to pay a visit to a man who said he owned C3PO. Why do I get myself in these predicaments?” Oh, John, you’re such a rebel! If only I could get myself into these situations with you!

Or how about the May 2nd post: “Man, if you leave Life cereal and milk in a bowl for 90 seconds, you have a bowl of giant spongy mass. No more milk and 8 inch squares.” Ah, to ponder the mind of a genius. A really wealthy, bored genius.

YouLookGreat

The user who goes by the name YouLookGreat, is perhaps my favorite person on Twitter to follow, if only for his biographic information which reads, “Your daily passive aggressive affirmation.” This man speaks my language, and I feel like he speaks to me on many levels. For instance, take his May 1 tweet: “Things are never as bad as they could be, but they’re usually worse than you think.” Or, take his April 29th tweet: “Everybody knows you are doing the best you can: they’re just not impressed.”

YouLookGreat shows me that there are, in fact, people out there who share the same disdain and lack of hope for humanity, and furthermore, it’s OK to share it with the world. Thank you, YouLookGreat.

Shia LaBeouf

In case you were wondering where you could find all those photos paparazzi take of Shia LaBeouf, look no further than his own Twitter page, where he shamelessly posts candid photos taken of himself in public.

“Spotted with his Mamma. Oh S***!” reads one post, with a link to a picture of himself posted to a celebrity Web site. This guy loves being famous, and encourages people to take part in his fame. Or perhaps his April 20 tweet to famed celebrity blogger Perez Hilton, asking simply “Would you?” implying both something grotesquely sexual and pompously disgusting.

Actors are interesting people. The more I’ve been following them on Twitter these days, the more glad I am that I’m not raking in millions of dollars and adored by everybody. Well, almost.

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