In January, her first semester of college, Nikkie Griggs discovered she was pregnant. Since giving birth to son Mason in October, she has been trying to balance life as a student and single mother.
“Pregnancy was hard, but motivating,” she said. “Things don’t always go your way. It’s motivating knowing [you’re] taking care of someone and setting an example.”
One of the largest hurdles for the 19-year-old University College freshman was receiving assistance from professors and advisers.
Griggs said when she told her adviser she was pregnant, her adviser said she could take an incomplete in a course if she couldn’t handle the work load.
Since Griggs gave birth in the middle of the semester, she had to take a few weeks off from school. She said her professors have not been very helpful, and her grades are suffering.
After explaining the situation to her professors, two of them told her she would have to get class notes from a friend and would not give her any hard copies.
“They pretty much asked me why I’m still in school,” Griggs said.
Taking care of a child while in school is a challenge, especially for those who are not married, said Martha Skeeters, associate professor in the women’s studies program.
“Single parents have amazing courage, are brave and work hard to get a degree and have a better future for themselves and their child,” she said.
The reality of a degree isn’t impossible for these students, but close, Skeeters said.
“With hard work and luck [it] can be done,” she said. “But most people and students can’t imagine how hard or close to impossible it is.”
Child care and money are some of the tangible things lacking in a single parent’s life, especially for students, Skeeters said.
“We as a university and as a society need to make child care more affordable,” Skeeters said.
Skeeters said more financial aid should be available to single parents too.
With a father in North Carolina and a distant mother, Griggs said several girls who lived on her floor in the residence halls in the spring helped her through the pregnancy by throwing her a baby shower.
Jamie Brown, nursing sophomore, gave birth to a girl in June. She said her family lives almost four hours away, so their help is limited. Brown said her co-workers sometimes baby-sit for free.
Griggs and Brown said they don’t have significant support from the fathers of their children.
Brown said she decided to stay in school after becoming pregnant in September 2007, because she said quitting would leave her working at some “dead end job.”
“I prefer to be working toward something,” she said.
Brown and Griggs said they know staying in school means they will spend less time with their children, but they think it is worth it to land a secure job after graduation and provide a stable life for their children.
Griggs said she has never regretted keeping her son.
“If you’re determined to keep your child, nothing can keep you from it but yourself,” she said.
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SoonerTexan88 3 years, 6 months ago
Good for these girls--I wish OU would offer more help
soonerborn88 3 years, 5 months ago
It is so refreshing to hear stories like this. I agree that OU should offer more help to women like this.